Thursday, June 11, 2015

all of me

Well at last... the tears have began to fall. Since February when these new diagnoses's and talks about trach's and feeding tubes (and other tubes and devices) began to happen I have been in a very strange place mentally and emotionally. All the while, never having any tears fall. Well the damn that held them back was removed late Tuesday night. Tears, tears, tears. How cleansing they are. Each drop holding so much weight within it and each drop collected by God. What a sweet thing to know. My faith has never been so blind nor has it ever been so full. It is not dictated by my circumstances but instead it is dictated by His character. And with that; I know I can go all in. So I sat there on that cliff and praised the Lord for the beauty that surrounded me. I opened my arms as far as I could expressing to Him that there is nothing I desire more than to have all of me used by Him.